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It seems easier to let things die than to harvest. But where is the nobility in that?

If all we did was go around colliding with each other merely exchanging energy and fluids with no intent of forming bonds and establishing something greater than the interaction of the two, we’d be a waste of kinetics.

I’ve been wanting to fight and change things for myself for a while now; And I realize I haven’t felt like I’ve battled because I’ve been nearly completely defensive. I’m a steel curtain with no hail mary guts because my academic emasculation has spilled them all over black and white linoleum. In my world, artistic endeavors almost always exist to offset deficiencies in scholarly academics.

It’s a bitch sometimes, making things so explicit but I need to in order to feel justified in even what I think. Most of all I dislike filler, the kind of [dramatic pinch me because I’m dreaming]-[dress me in checkered houndstooth and socially valuable materials because I’m expressive and can afford it]-[disenfranchised cash is king but I remain loyal to itunes and rocking out] romanticized pithiness. But I’m doing exactly that right now, and will probably continue to do it for so long as I weild an expansive vocabulary and have a beautiful world to describe it with.

I want to be honest with myself and others because I want to understand and be understood, not just recognized. It’s a lavish desire to be sure, but seriously, its a right. Now if only there were someone to talk to.

With peace,

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